The Blood & Moone Files – Episode 6: The Tree Wizard (Final Edit) Written by Justin Evans | Final Showrunner Edit S1 - E6 - THE TREE WIZARD DOG BOY DAN Well now, my babies, after that last little ol’ ritual-gone-wrong in the shed, our Blood and Moone boys are feelin’ the heat. Chandler’s shakin’, John’s diggin’ for answers, and the shadows around this town are gettin’ longer. Ain’t it always that way, though? You tug on one cursed thread and the whole damn quilt starts unravelin’. This week, we meet a fella some folks call the Tree Wizard. Crazy? Maybe. But sometimes crazy folks know things sane folks are scared to say out loud. Let’s see what the boys find out today... INT. SMALL TOWN INTERSECTION – MORNING SFX: Cars honking. Whistles. Boots scuffing pavement. CHANDLER BLOOD Hey! You can’t park there! Sir! DRIVER Cool your jets! Two minutes. CHANDLER BLOOD I don’t care if it’s two minutes—it’s a fire lane! SFX: Tires screech. A car peels out. DRIVER Eat shit and die, Tampon Boy! CHANDLER BLOOD (muttering) ...what a dick. ABE That guy in the Jeep almost clipped you. CHANDLER BLOOD That guy in the Jeep was the mayor, Abe. ABE You ok? CHANDLER BLOOD Peachy. Just holding this whole circus together. (calling out) Hey! Keep it moving, come on! ABE Good luck, kid. See’ya at the shop. CHANDLER BLOOD Thanks, Abe. Trust me, I’d rather be at the shop than out here directing traffic. (calling out) Hey-hey-hey! THAT’s a fire lane! No parking! (muttering) What’s everybody’s obsession with parking RIGHT THERE... INT. BLOOD’S APARTMENT – LATER SFX: DOOR CLOSES. BODY SLUMPS AGAINST THE CLOSED DOOR. CHANDLER BLOOD *sigh* Home. Finally. John? You home, John? SFX: NOTE RUSTLING. CHANDLER BLOOD (CONT) (reading note) Be back around dinner time. Trying to get some more info about what’s happening. Eat without me if you want. John. (to self) Great. Ramen it is I guess. SFX: QUICK CUT-WATER IN TEAPOT-BOWL-SPOON-TEAPOT ON BURNER - TV POWERS ON - STATIC THEN COMMERCIAL STARTS "Cursed Smart Mirror" Ad: • Mirror Spirit: "Unleash your true self with the Accursed Reflection Mirror! Reflect not only your image but your deepest fears. Caution: Mirror may occasionally reveal alternate, horrifying realities. [Chilling whispers]" CHANDLER BLOOD Cut the shit! I don’t have time for this today! SFX: TV POWERS OFF CAYM (chiding) Chandler... Chandler... A name doesn’t simply lock me away, Chandler. Come, look at me, let us have a little tête-à-tête. What do you say? CHANDLER BLOOD (to himself) Focus. Deep breaths. You're not gonna crack. He’s on a leash now, just use it. Mirrors don’t speak, he’s just in your head. SFX: Tapping on glass from inside mirror. CAYM (softly, in mirror) You looked in once, Chandler. You don’t get to look away now. CHANDLER BLOOD (startled) Shit— SFX: Glass cracks. Kettle still whistling. CAYM That’s it. Take my hand. CHANDLER BLOOD Not today dammit! Get your ass out of my mirror, Kermit! Let me eat in peace! SFX: ALL DEMONIC NOISES, WHISPERS, ETC STOP. KETTLE STILL WHISTLES CHANDLER BLOOD Holy shit, it worked. CAYM *TITTERING LAUGHTER* CHANDLER BLOOD Dammit! DOG BOY DAN While the Chan man attempts to parent his very own bratty demon riding shotgun in his head. John happened to get in touch with an old acquaintance that just happened to be camping out near the edge of town. Now as you know by now. John boy likes to play the last couple years close to the chest. I wonder who this infamous character from the hidden circles of the occult Mr. Moone used to run in can tell him about the going’s on here in town... INT. WOODS – EARLY AFTERNOON SFX: Dry leaves crunching. Light breeze. John approaches a makeshift clearing. TREE WIZARD You’re late, John. The moss already told me. JOHN MOONE I came as fast as I could. It’s happening again. Figured I’d come see the infamous “tree wizard” of Calgary. SFX: HANDS CLASP AND SHAKE IN GREETING JOHN MOONE Been a long time. TREE WIZARD At least five seasons. JOHN MOONE Sorry to skip the pleasantries and all but, what have you got for me. What’s stirring? TREE WIZARD Ajim stirs. I feel it in the roots. Beneath the stone. Beneath the *bones*. JOHN MOONE Ajim, huh? So that’s the thing I’ve been feeling disrupting all the veiled ones. If that’s the case and Ajim’s to blame then I need to know how to stop it. TREE WIZARD You don’t stop an ifrit. You redirect it. Like floodwaters. JOHN MOONE An ifrit, wait, you gotta be kidding me. Like desert-fire-demon ifrit? I thought they were all sealed away in vessels ages ago. TREE WIZARD Until someone broke the seal on his. Now the vessel is not a pot, but a man. JOHN MOONE Who? TREE WIZARD The one with fire in his chest. The one who dreams of burning. JOHN MOONE Come on, stop with the cryptic bullshit. Remember when I pulled your ass out of the fire in Denmark? Do me a solid, Rob, talk to me straight. TREE WIZARD Fine, spoiled sport. And stop using my mundane name, it just sounds weird coming from you. I don’t know his name but I can feel that he’s close, somewhere in the hills nearby. He carries the echo of the broken vessel. It rings through the trees. JOHN MOONE So is there anything we can do to find him? Can we reinforce the seal and lock him back up or something? An ifrit is new territory for me. TREE WIZARD Not unless you find the sigil. And the sigil is... scattered. Burned. Forgotten. On the bright side you know *this* territory. Where would one find a person with a fire in them? Hate, self loathing, anger. JOHN MOONE From what Chan’s been telling me, maybe the sheriff’s office-a lot of anger there... No telling though, the whole town is off somehow. If we *can* find him then what do we do? TREE WIZARD Hope the ifrit fears what’s coming more than it craves power. JOHN MOONE And if it doesn’t? TREE WIZARD Then the new vessel burns. And maybe everything else with him. JOHN MOONE Wait. What do you mean “fears what’s coming”? What the hell else is coming? TREE WIZARD Someone’s trying to awaken the mother under the mountain. JOHN MOONE Li- TREE WIZARD No! I mean, yes, but don’t say her name. JOHN MOONE Shit... TREE WIZARD And it keeps getting deeper, that’s why I’m gettin the hell out of dodge. You’re lucky I was still around. I’ll be moving on soon. You should too. JOHN MOONE I can’t. TREE WIZARD Why not? JOHN MOONE I’m not working alone anymore. INT. BLOOD’S APARTMENT – EVENING SFX: Vacuum whirring. Music blasting. Drawer slams. CHANDLER BLOOD (to himself, over music) Clean apartment, clean mind. Just keep moving. Don't stop moving. SFX: Coffee pours. Microwave beeps. He sits. CAYM (softly) What do you think you’re cleansing? You invited me. You can’t uninvite a storm. CHANDLER BLOOD Shut up. Just shut up for five damn minutes, KERMIT. CAYM Five minutes? As you wish. SFX: Knock at door. Music stops. JOHN MOONE Chan? CHANDLER BLOOD (manic) I’m fine. Totally fine. Everything is spotless. JOHN MOONE You vacuumed the ceiling. CHANDLER BLOOD It needed it. JOHN MOONE You need rest. CHANDLER BLOOD I can’t rest. If I rest, he talks. If I sleep, he *gets in*. JOHN MOONE Then use his name, that’s why we went out to BFE just to get Aunt Catherine’s help. This should be your safe place. We’ll ward it just to be sure. CHANDLER BLOOD I have been using his name!... Sorry. It’s just not working like I want, he keeps weaseling his way back to the front. Wait, what do you mean “ward it”? Like with crystals and sage? JOHN MOONE Sage might help bring down the powerful bleach smell in here but no, more like with salt lines and iron nails. “Old ways” type stuff. CHANDLER BLOOD (sighs) Okay. Okay. I just... Something doesn’t feel right, and I think he’s figuring out a way around the whole “naming” thing. JOHN MOONE I know, you’ve had a pretty intense couple of weeks. I’ll help. That’s why I’m here. Come on. CHANDLER BLOOD John? JOHN MOONE Yeah? CHANDLER BLOOD No more notes. JOHN MOONE What the hel- CHANDLER BLOOD Everytime you leave me a note I end up going through some kind of demonic episode. JOHN MOONE Oh. (smiling) No more notes, Chan. Now sit down and let me get you some *real* food. SFX: Door closes behind them. DOG BOY DAN The deeper you dig, my babies, the older the bones you find. And some bones? They don’t stay buried. With Chandler unravelin’, Caym whisperin’, and ancient vessels crackin’... we might be headin’ for a firestorm. Hold on tight now. Something’s telling me the wind’s about to change. (Outro credits, etc.)